Hello people once agian =) today had my cross country run.. got 2oth in position.. even it sounds so lousy.. i am still happy i manage to completed the race.. i could had given up.. My mind was half blacking out.. i din drink or eat anything b4 the race.. ran wif an empty stomach.. it has really a very long painful moment.. i kept telling myself not to give up... mind over body.. was the key that kept me going.. while running in the race.. many things came through my mind.. reminding me of the past when i was sec 1 till now sec 5.. so many mermories.. but i kind of disappointed getting 20th cause i used to be better than that.. sec 3 was my best.. i got 6th even being the disadvantage of the B division..
Today i listen to a few songs to clam my mind down after the broke up.. it still does go through my mind alot.. its never easy ... because its a feeling in me.. from my heart.. i can't force it.. or else i will never be true to myself.. even she had lost all feelings for me.. it hasn't for me.. i dun know how she managed to do that too.. but it still exist in me.. so many things ran through my mind.. recording how i feel into the white notebook.. The songs below i post them because i can say that is how i really feel.. its alot of mixture... either you love or you hate.. because i only know very limited of what really happened.. my english does suck alot.. but i dun care how i type here because i want to spot my mistakes... An Jing has been the song i been listening for a very long time.. until it is really happening to me.. its a nice song.. Today when i ran through my mind agian why this feeling i kept feeling is because.. that i can accept the fact she lost feelings for me and broke up.. i can't accept is the way of how it all happen... maybe i was too slow or unaware.. Its too difficult to think over it just like that.. I choose to slove matters than to replace it wif another thing.. because i think i should learn to slove things and learn all this things of how it all happened... I still think of the past.. but i dun live in the past.. its dragging me.. whatever i think of.. it always come to my mine.. even its like this now...
2 more weeks and i am off to australia for 10 days.. leaving all my sorrows unslove.. it will always remain.. i need to clear things out.. but there is nothing i can do abt it now either.. so i live with it.. thinking everyday... This journey for me has always been rough.. ups and downs.. Hope i can ever live my life to the fullest..
Sometimes in life you got to live with what you get..Only if i could live with what i must get
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